This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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