quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize
