Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
