Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
