At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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