I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
