you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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