Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
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