The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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