I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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