I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
