it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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