I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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