Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I will pee on everything he values.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
