a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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