Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I am mentally ready for anal.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
