just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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