I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
