remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
