Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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