im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm too high and old for this...
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
