Whatcha textin bout Willis?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize