walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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