You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
