At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
