She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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