why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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