Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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