I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
