your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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