i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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