Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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