IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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