i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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