I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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