i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize