Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
