so explain again why im purple
no
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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