I think scott just propositioned me for sex
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
