Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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