That's when you crack a 10am beer
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
