May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
