Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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