We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
