I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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