yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Randomize