he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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