Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
