Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
