Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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