But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Randomize